Attachment theory: How to support your child by using their birth chart

They say babies don't come with manuals and life doesn’t come with a guidebook, but they’re wrong—the birth chart blueprint is the best map!

 

By learning about your child's astrological makeup, you gain insight into how they process emotions and perceive the world, and you can in turn support them on their mission. 

 

Generational patterns can often be seen in the birth chart. For example, my little Lioness daughter Eleven has a Leo Midheaven. 

Leo Sun, Leo Midheaven, Leo Rising

Leo Sun, Leo Midheaven, Leo Rising

I have Leo Rising, and my mom has an August 4th Leo Sun (same as POTUS Barack Obama).

 

My father has an Aries Sun. I have an Aries Midheaven and North Node. Eleven has an Aries Moon. 

 

And since the Moon represents your perception of your mother, Eleven having an Aries Moon means she perceives me as the embodiment of that independent Aries power. 

 

Her Aries Moon is also the apex point of her yod/finger of God aspect pattern. I also have a yod which points to my Gemini Sun. 

 

Since Eleven and I are partners in bringing radical shifts to our lineage, it makes sense that you can see in her birth chart how intimately I am connected to her destiny in life.

 

What this all means for me as a mother: even though my solo trailblazer journey toward my Aries North Node is the opposite of my comfort zone, Eleven is going to see me as being that Aries warrior goddess regardless, so I gotta be it! 

 

So my daughter, in many ways, is my own catalyst to Ram on toward the Aries mountaintop, which is what I’m supposed to do for my soul’s evolution in this lifetime.

 

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Attachment theory

Around 2/3 of us are lucky to experience Secure Infant Attachment. The caregiver (mother, father, grandparents, everybody acting as a parental figure) responds appropriately, promptly and consistently to the needs of the baby, and the baby thrives.

However, 1/3 of us aren’t lucky; our caregivers aren’t OK, so we develop an Insecure Infant Attachment. This is a drama and it leaves a scar in our souls. Few children will have the luck to become secure in their adulthood; most of them will grow into insecure adults. So, what are the insecure infant attachments? And how do they look like?
— https://cezarspace.wordpress.com/2014/02/07/attachment-styles-when-love-is-traded/
Click the photo to read the full article

Click the photo to read the full article

Cezar Danilevici also says, "to add to the complexity of attachment, they way the child perceives the caregiver might be different from how the caregiver is in reality...Sometimes, attachment is something you perceive and not something that is actually done to you."

 

This also can be seen in the birth chart - children in the same family with different Moon signs and placements often have differing perceptions of the same two parents.

 

Codependent relationships are but replications of subconscious learned behavior in the youth. The rampant relationship destroyers such as narcissism, histrionic, and borderline personality disorders, are not chemical imbalances but brain structuring that formed in the first few years of life as a protective response to environmental stimuli. 

 

As parents and caregivers, we certainly have our work cut out for us, and we cannot just raise all children in the same way.

 

But how do we know what a baby really needs?

 

This is where the astrological blueprint comes in.

 

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Understanding Your Child's purpose
 

My Understanding Your Child astrology chart report is beneficial for parents, guardians, relatives, educators, or anyone seeking to best support the youth in their lives.

Eleven at her babyschool. Clearly in this moment she was like, "nope."

Eleven at her babyschool. Clearly in this moment she was like, "nope."

 

The super-focused reading informs how a child processes their emotions, expresses themselves, relates to siblings, and perceives their parents.

 

Another dimension of my AstroServices is to assist teachers in looking at the temperamental makeup of their classrooms. Knowing which children have what temperaments and why gives educators an edge in creating harmonious environments. All elements and modalities are necessary for balance.

 

My reports can assist teachers in incorporating particular learning styles into their lesson plans, or creating mindful small groups for children with a well-rounded circle of complementary energies. That way, you can avoid creating a small group full of Fixed or Fire Moon children who blaze down the place.

 

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How the birth chart tells your story

Eleven’s due date was 11/11, but she was born on the 14th. And when I compare her birth chart with the chart of 11/11, it makes so much sense why she arrived when she did.

Scorpio Sun, Aries Moon, Scorpio Rising, Leo Midheaven.

Scorpio Sun, Aries Moon, Scorpio Rising, Leo Midheaven.

If Eleven had been born on 11/11, she’d have an Aquarius Moon instead of the Aries Moon. I have no planets in Aquarius, so it would have been an interesting anomaly.

 

If Eleven had been born even a few hours earlier instead of at the stroke of sunrise at exactly 6:00, she would have had an Aries Moon, but not the yod/finger of God which I have in my own chart. 

 

As I mentioned earlier, she and I are the Ones who are disrupting the order of things that have existed for generations in my lineage, so Eleven had to be born right when that yod formed in the sky, and not a minute sooner.

 

So with my parents being an Aries and a Leo, and Aries and Leo playing such important roles in both my and Eleven’s lives, it’s more confirmation about what she and I are here to do to improve upon the process of those energies.

 

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The Astrological Inheritance

The most recent Understanding Your Child astrology chart reading I gave was for a 6-month new baby, and so profound. The baby girl has a Gemini Sun with a Leo Moon and a Gemini Rising. 

 

Without knowing the mama’s birth date, I delineated that this child perceived her mother as being especially Leonine, and that both of her parents made a great team in sharing the responsibilities of raising up their child in the way she should go, as there were a lot of harmonious mutual receptions among the parenting planets and the parental 4th and 10th house axis.

 

Turns out that her mama is a Leo, and father a Gemini. 

 

The generational patterning doesn’t get more blatant than that!

 

And for the record, Leo and Gemini energy is particularly electric. Fire + air … fireworks.

 

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Naturally, in looking at a child’s birth chart it’s not necessary to focus on their career path or their love life. 

 

My Understanding Your Child chart readings focus on the child’s emotions and the perception of their parents. The condition of the moon indicates how a child expresses themselves, and also the type of parenting that is most effective for them. 

 

As we know, children from the same family have their own unique relationships with their parents. It’s all connected: the moon sign, the birth order, the age of parents at birth, the place of birth, the cultural immersions - all play roles.

 

How to Quit Projecting onto Your Children

Click the photo to read the Age of Eleven blog

Click the photo to read the Age of Eleven blog

As parents, it’s easy to fall into the trap of giving our children what we didn’t receive, or what we think is best for them, rather than listening to what they tell us they need from us. 

 

I grew up nurture-deficient, and my mother passed on her Cap Moon to me, which makes sense why I rarely feel her on the nurturing level. To this day, I’m only now getting comfortable with letting my emotions flow freely, and I can see now that I never had a container for that. 

 

Eleven’s Moon is dynamically, emotionally aspected all over, so her “issue” in this life will have naught to do with a deficiency of emotional validation. 

 

What I’ve had to learn with her pertains more to simply allowing her to feel her emotions, process and act through them, and move on.

 

A lot of the times when babies cry, adults rush to hush them. “Oh, don’t cry, baby, don’t cry,” and they rock them hoping that the baby stops.

 

Let that baby cry! And at the very least, don't tell them they shouldn't cry.

 

Sometimes Aries Moon Eleven just has to be weepy for a second, or angry that she has to take a bath, or upset that she can't have her iPad. So I stay present with her, I don’t punish or abandon her while she’s in her moment, and I allow her to feel it all. 

 

And then in just a little while, this, too, shall pass. She'll hop in the tub and we'll wash her hair and all will be well again. The Aries Moon doesn't hold a long grudge; they just have to get it out so they can move on.

 

To be clear, I don't mean that I'm advocating for the "Cry It Out" method where a parent leaves their infant alone in their crib cage to cry until they pass out.

 

I AM saying that it is important to demonstrate to our children that it is okay to vocally express themselves. We should stay present and supportive of them as they feel what they feel so that they don't learn how to stifle their emotions just to survive and placate their impatient caregivers.

 

So while I don’t pore over all the gory details of my toddler’s birth chart in an attempt to control her destiny, I use the information to understand how I can best support her based on her unique needs. 

 

And you can, too. 

 

Follow the button below to book a reading with me for your child. And if you're an educator who would like a group analysis of the children in your care, contact me so we can devise a plan.

 

We owe it to the next generation to be better and do better.